by Jocelyn | Feb 10, 2017 | Pregnancy
You blink and a thousand things happen in barely over a week – we are at 36w+5 days today!
Last week, I was lectured for eating a calzone (subsequently lectured by the same doctor this week for the SAME calzone as noted in my blood sugar log). I had a fantastically cozy baby shower on Saturday, complete with horrific games like melted chocolate bars in diapers and “pin the sperm on the egg”, and even snuck in two cupcakes and managed to not faceplant on my sugar readings afterwards. Monday was another growth scan with another ultrasound technician, reading my super chunk in at 7lbs 7oz. Yesterday was another non-stress test where my blood sugar and weight and overall health is assessed as fantastic, punctuated by absolutely infuriating conversations with one of 3-5 doctors who can’t remember what we spoke about the week previous.
I spoke to my sister in law, who happens to have done this childbirth thing 5 times AND is an amazing RN, about my frustrations with my situation. She’s had gestational diabetes, as recently as last year with her newest son. It’s nice to have someone who is on the inside and ALSO has gone through something similar. She suggested I take next week off from my appointments and non-stress testing to just let myself relax and take things one step at a time with the baby. I’m not really sure how I feel about skipping, which surprised me. I thought I would be all the way on board with dodging the appointment. Trying to balance my desire to not be bullied and pressured by a medical team and also stay on top of the health of this baby is feeling pretty impossible right now. My sister, the MPH/RD, says she doesn’t think I should miss a data point when we’re this close to birth.
But, on the sunny side, 2 days until FULL TERM and that much closer to meeting little Aurora.
The most stressful non-stress tests of all time.
by Jocelyn | Feb 1, 2017 | Pregnancy
35weeks+2 – less than 5 weeks to go, and technically we will be full term in less than 2 weeks!
I went to a neighbor’s baby shower last weekend. She’s due a bit after I am and our husbands work together, so I awkwardly ventured out with a small cloth diaper and soft bamboo swaddle blanket gift. It made me a little more grateful and less anxious for the shower that is being thrown for me this weekend. It will just be a handful of the wives that work in my husband’s detachment, there will be food I can actually eat, and it should be a lot more laid back. I appreciate more intimate gatherings and don’t need a large crowd to feel like the occasion was celebrated appropriately, and that’s been true since I can remember my mother throwing birthday parties.
Jake joined me for the ultrasound this week and I always love having him there. I already know he is a good dad, I see him with his older kids, but soon I’ll get to see him with a newborn and I am so excited for that part of our journey. The baby only appeared to have gained 2 ounces in the last week, which hopefully will leave the physician with less to make me feel terrified over at my appointment on Thursday. I was prescribed metformin for my gestational diabetes fasting blood sugar numbers and I have been a very bad patient. I have taken exactly zero of the pills. It’s a hard thing to juggle: taking the pill scares me because of what it might do to the baby, and not taking the pill scares me because of what it might do to the baby. Either way, on Thursday I’ll be in trouble with the doctor.
I’m pretty proud of myself for updating so recently to my last post! Nothing major to talk about, just routine. Next week should have a baby shower report, another picture from my next weekly ultrasound, and hopefully no mention of induction from my doctor yet.
The weekly shot of Aurora. If it looks like a Rorschach test, I understand. This is her profile, facing left, eyes closed.
by Jocelyn | Jan 23, 2017 | Pregnancy
34 weeks and one day – less than 6 weeks to go!
I’m almost tired of the weekly ultrasounds. Not the ultrasounds themselves, because watching the baby is fascinating. Today Aurora played with the umbilical cord, got bored with it, and set it directly on her nose. I’m mostly tired of the guessing and the estimates and how it affects the future of my “high risk” care. Once a week, an ultrasound technician fires up the machine and measures her skull, her femur, and her abdomen then guesses how much she weighs. Then they compare these sizes to the “average” size of babies at her gestational age and tell me if she’s ahead or behind the curve. Her first measurement said she had a huge head at 32 weeks but now it seems less huge at 34 weeks, but I have a new tech who might measure differently. Her femur is measuring at a week ahead, but they use her abdomen to measure weight and they’re guessing she’s 6lbs 9oz, up from 5lbs 4oz last week. If she keeps this up for 6 weeks until her due date, I’ll have a 13lbs baby. Most estimates are high, usually off by 2lbs or so, and I’m not letting myself worry yet.
Unfortunately, this gives the medical team at the hospital grounds to use their scare tactics to freak me out. They’ve already whispered the word “induction” and made mention that they don’t “let” patients with gestational diabetes go past 39 weeks, but I’m armed with information and printouts, and I will be a very hard sell on medical intervention when my blood sugar has been under control. I am also incredibly grateful for my husband’s full support in everything, including telling the doctors that we are going to do this my way, and that means no unnecessary inductions or C-sections without a very damn good medical reason. I read a fascinating article about gestational diabetes and big babies on a website called Evidence Based Birth which has made me a lot more confident about keeping my medical decisions as MY medical decisions.
Aside from twice weekly medical appointments, the wonderful spouses at my husband’s office here on base are throwing me a small baby shower on the 4th of February, and I just received a virtual invitation to a webcam baby shower on the 19th of February with my dad’s side of the family. The lesson here is: don’t say “I won’t be having a baby shower because I live in the middle of nowhere with no friends” out loud or you’ll get three baby showers. We had one in November with my mom’s side of the family at Thanksgiving, too. I feel very loved!
by Jocelyn | Jan 10, 2017 | Pregnancy
I’m a bit terrible at this. My last post was November 7th, still in my second trimester. I’m currently 32 weeks and 2 days along, with less than 8 weeks to go. I probably should be more frequent with this, and it’s not like I haven’t had the time, but I’m easily preoccupied with other things.
I have been crawling the internet, integrating myself into various “mom” communities, researching, trying my best to figure out preferences for things I can’t possible fathom until I’m actually done with the being pregnant part. The Mom Side of the Internet is fascinating, and there’s a Facebook group, twitter hashtag, and blog for just about every interest you could imagine. I found myself in a group for women who are extremely passionate about buying a specific brand of baby blanket (I now own a couple and think they are pretty fabulous), several for moms who like buying pretty woven wraps and fastening their babies to themselves in various positions, almost a dozen just about cloth diapering, and an especially useful support group for people with my newest diagnosis – gestational diabetes.
I think I’d prefer a different name for the condition, because it’s temporary (hence the gestational) and it’s a hormonal issue between my body and my pancreas. Unfortunately, the diagnosis has landed me in the High Risk Pregnancy category at the hospital here. Thank GOODNESS my sister is a registered dietitian and all around food wizard otherwise I would be lost. Although I manage blood sugar numbers effectively with diet and going on walks, there is a fuss being made already with twice weekly doctor visits and weekly trips to a Certified Diabetes Educator, and everyone telling me that they will probably want to induce me early. The baby is on track to weigh something normal, although my weekly ultrasound so far has indicated the baby has a huge head in the 99th percentile. I am trying not to let the physicians and nurses and techs scare me or talk me into doing anything I am not interested in doing. I still have almost two months to figure out what feels right.
We are just about set up as far as baby stuff, I think. Crib? Check. Stroller? Check. Outfits? Check. Carseat? Check. I’m probably missing a million useful things but I really don’t think I’ll know exactly what I need and it’s hard to think about right now with all of the blood sugar management and strict meal schedule I’m on. I barely have time to think about being ready when all I think about all day is counting my carbs.
Coming Soon! <3
by Jocelyn | Nov 7, 2016 | Pregnancy
23 weeks pregnant isn’t too late to get to recording the whole experience, is it?
We conceived our little Aurora-to-be on or around June 11, 2016, which just so happened to be our wedding day. We were ready. I’ve had baby fever pretty much since I started talking to Jake back in December 2014, and the clock has been ticking pretty loudly as well, since I’m not in my 20s anymore. Jake is already a wonderful father to two children, who I absolutely adore, so I knew he was the right one to make an even bigger family with. I can elaborate more on how in love I am and on being a bonus parent later, that almost needs its own blog.
Jake has wanted to name a baby Aurora pretty much forever, and I was hesitant about it because it didn’t flow off of my tongue and has a billion syllables. I had a whole list: Charlotte, Margot, Arya, but when I saw her on the ultrasound and she no longer looked like a gummy bear with a tail, Aurora just felt right. I still have a few months to change my mind, but right now it’s really what we both want.
The first trimester was weird. I could probably list dozens of more adjectives, but weird is the most succinctly I can put it. I wanted to be touched, but didn’t. I cried plenty and often. Weeks 4 through about 7 were not very fun, mostly emotionally. I am blessed with an iron gut, and the nausea of morning sickness never amounted to anything but just a general malaise that I could quell with large stacks of flapjacks and bacon. I may be one of the few women who actually gained weight in the first trimester because I was more motivated to eat than normal to make the nausea go away. Jake and I enjoy telling people how much I could pack away even while groaning that I didn’t feel well at the breakfast table.
I’m only 5 weeks from the third trimester and only 17 weeks to go total, which is crazy to think about! This trimester has been pretty sleepy, aside from an awesome ultrasound appointment where we found out we were expecting a girl. I first felt the baby moving about a week ago, and she has kept me updated on her antics with kicks and bumps. Everything else is pretty uneventful, aside from the growing bump, the inflating weight, and this round ligament that I’m surprised isn’t the #1 thing pregnant women talk about because it is the actual worst. My third trimester is supposed to bring out the whiniest in me, so I’m sure my round ligament will get overshadowed by some other painful drama queen.
This seems like a good summary for my first post, and I look forward to elaborating more, ranting some, and seeing where this new life takes me.
